 |
 |
| Make a Smilebox slideshow |
Tell me what you think & what you want to hear about!!!
Saturday, January 30, 2010
Friday, January 29, 2010
Invisible Illness
I understand having a hidden disability and the pain of those when people don't respect them. So many people suffer from illnesses that are not visible to the eye; but are life consuming to those who suffer from them & their loved ones. I have lived with ADHD my entire life. I did not begin taking medication until I was in college and my despair hit an all time low. According to all standardized tests I had above average intelligence, and because I always had straight A's and took honors/AP classes, it was easy for my parents and teachers to dismiss the ADHD as "under control". My parents did the best they could with the limited information provided to them by the medical community. Growing up in the 80's, ADD/ADHD was still a new frontier, and even those seeking out information and help where often misled or given partial truths based on limited research and understanding of the condition at the time.
Despite amazing medical advances in the field of psychological illness and treatment, those suffering from mental health issues are still branded with a "scarlet letter" or social stigma. Knowledge is our greatest weapon and I am constantly reading, researching and learning all I can about ADD/ADHD. One of my favorite books is, "Moms with ADD - A Self-Help Manual" by Christine A. Adamec.
She says on page 83; Lies, Damn Lies, & Statistics- “It’s easy to misunderstand or purposely misuse statistics, and that is often what happens when the conversation turns to the number or percentage of children taking Ritalin. Let me give you an example. What if I told you that use of Ritalin by high school children more than tripled from 1975 to 1993? Oh, no! But you might feel differently if you learned more facts: The percentage of high school students taking Ritalin in 1975 was .22 percent (less than 1 percent), and that rate increased to .70 in 1993 (still less than 1 percent). This statistic, and many others like it, was reported in the February 1, 2000, issue of the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, which reviewed studies on children taking Ritalin. The researchers found that studies have revealed many children with ADD are UNDERMEDICATED. In some areas, only 25% of children meeting the diagnostic criteria for attention deficit disorder were taking medication.
They also found disparities in who was receiving medication; for example, African American children were half as likely to receive Ritalin as White children. Boys were more likely to receive it than girls. The authors concluded, "Stimulant treatments are prescribed with greater frequency than 10 years ago and are obtained by about two thirds of children with ADHD at some point in their childhood; however, the availability and use of stimulants varies substantially by geographic region and also seems to be influenced by gender and race.
“Perhaps there should be an outcry: Not ENOUGH children are getting the help they need!"
It was such an eye opener for me and I am sure so many other women. People make comments or casually pass judgments without knowing all of the facts. Nobody is asking you to agree on medication or treatment, but PLEASE remember that ADD/ADHD is REAL! It is no different than if one had diabetes and had to take insulin. As the old saying goes, "Do not judge another until you have walked a mile in their shoes" It is very a very real (CAT Scans & other brain imagining) and life altering condition.
Finally, ADD adults have spent a lot of their lives hearing that they don't measure up at school and work. They may not even realize that have very real strengths that are a direct result of what is referred to as their "disorder." While each person has his or her particular strengths, which are a by-product of upbringing, personality, and inborn skills, there are some common gifts among ADD adults. Many adults with ADD have had to overcome a lifetime of hearing that they're insufficient and dive deep to find talents that lie beneath the surface. Often, it's just that the "window dressing" is missing-for example, some students are poor spellers, but they have wonderful, creative ideas that lie obscured beneath their poorly spelled words. Similarly, many ADD adults are rough-cut gems, and can shine if they are shaped in the right ways. They may get tripped up early in their careers at entry-level jobs that require attention to detail and obedience to structure, which doesn't let their higher-order thinking and creativity come to the fore.
Energy, risk-taking, lack of inhibition, willingness to take risks, outgoing nature, initiative, intense passion & energy can, with the correct guidance & motivation, overcome whatever obstacles lie in one's path. The brain of the ADD adult tends to allow in a greater number of unfiltered stimuli, and this rush of ideas can give people a heightened sense of what's possible. Because ADD allows for unfettered access to this total universe of ideas, many adults with this condition have great powers of creativity and invention. In fact, the creative process of ADD adult is difficult for non-ADD people to understand, and the manner in which these adults arrive at new ideas involves intuitive nonlinear leaps that may seem unfathomable to others.
As with everything in life, it is both a blessing & a curse; depends on what day you ask me. Today is looking pretty good!
Despite amazing medical advances in the field of psychological illness and treatment, those suffering from mental health issues are still branded with a "scarlet letter" or social stigma. Knowledge is our greatest weapon and I am constantly reading, researching and learning all I can about ADD/ADHD. One of my favorite books is, "Moms with ADD - A Self-Help Manual" by Christine A. Adamec.
She says on page 83; Lies, Damn Lies, & Statistics- “It’s easy to misunderstand or purposely misuse statistics, and that is often what happens when the conversation turns to the number or percentage of children taking Ritalin. Let me give you an example. What if I told you that use of Ritalin by high school children more than tripled from 1975 to 1993? Oh, no! But you might feel differently if you learned more facts: The percentage of high school students taking Ritalin in 1975 was .22 percent (less than 1 percent), and that rate increased to .70 in 1993 (still less than 1 percent). This statistic, and many others like it, was reported in the February 1, 2000, issue of the Journal of the American Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry, which reviewed studies on children taking Ritalin. The researchers found that studies have revealed many children with ADD are UNDERMEDICATED. In some areas, only 25% of children meeting the diagnostic criteria for attention deficit disorder were taking medication.
They also found disparities in who was receiving medication; for example, African American children were half as likely to receive Ritalin as White children. Boys were more likely to receive it than girls. The authors concluded, "Stimulant treatments are prescribed with greater frequency than 10 years ago and are obtained by about two thirds of children with ADHD at some point in their childhood; however, the availability and use of stimulants varies substantially by geographic region and also seems to be influenced by gender and race.
“Perhaps there should be an outcry: Not ENOUGH children are getting the help they need!"
It was such an eye opener for me and I am sure so many other women. People make comments or casually pass judgments without knowing all of the facts. Nobody is asking you to agree on medication or treatment, but PLEASE remember that ADD/ADHD is REAL! It is no different than if one had diabetes and had to take insulin. As the old saying goes, "Do not judge another until you have walked a mile in their shoes" It is very a very real (CAT Scans & other brain imagining) and life altering condition.
Finally, ADD adults have spent a lot of their lives hearing that they don't measure up at school and work. They may not even realize that have very real strengths that are a direct result of what is referred to as their "disorder." While each person has his or her particular strengths, which are a by-product of upbringing, personality, and inborn skills, there are some common gifts among ADD adults. Many adults with ADD have had to overcome a lifetime of hearing that they're insufficient and dive deep to find talents that lie beneath the surface. Often, it's just that the "window dressing" is missing-for example, some students are poor spellers, but they have wonderful, creative ideas that lie obscured beneath their poorly spelled words. Similarly, many ADD adults are rough-cut gems, and can shine if they are shaped in the right ways. They may get tripped up early in their careers at entry-level jobs that require attention to detail and obedience to structure, which doesn't let their higher-order thinking and creativity come to the fore.
Energy, risk-taking, lack of inhibition, willingness to take risks, outgoing nature, initiative, intense passion & energy can, with the correct guidance & motivation, overcome whatever obstacles lie in one's path. The brain of the ADD adult tends to allow in a greater number of unfiltered stimuli, and this rush of ideas can give people a heightened sense of what's possible. Because ADD allows for unfettered access to this total universe of ideas, many adults with this condition have great powers of creativity and invention. In fact, the creative process of ADD adult is difficult for non-ADD people to understand, and the manner in which these adults arrive at new ideas involves intuitive nonlinear leaps that may seem unfathomable to others.
As with everything in life, it is both a blessing & a curse; depends on what day you ask me. Today is looking pretty good!
Sunday, January 24, 2010
Childhood Dreams & Expectations
In thinking about childhood dreams and youthful visions about what I thought life's great journey had in store for me; I have come to the shocking and unsettling conclusion that I didn't really have any, certainly not enough. I had fleeting fantasies about a life far away from my own, but this was more of an escape to take me away from a place I never felt I belonged.
The one constant in my life has been that I have always felt different, out-of-place and never truly comfortable in my own skin. For as long as I can remember, something has always seemed to be missing, a piece of the puzzle that just won't fit. What I am chasing I do not know, but the harder I search, the more elusive this "thing" becomes to find. At 31-years-old, finding me has become a journey with no destination.
My childhood was far from perfect, but I had/have parents who love/loved me and according to all educational standards a slightly above average intelligence. I studied, learned and did everything I was "suppose" to do, but it just didn't add up. Somewhere along the way, this mathematical equation that was supposed to equal me having a happy and productive adult life went wrong. My miscalculations along the way have not come without a price. The overwhelming realization is that I never had a destination in mind; I couldn't keep my eye on the prize because I never knew what it was or if I even wanted it.
Is it possible to fear success as much as failure? I never imagined that I would be a single mother still searching for love at 31-years-old, but when I really think about it; I never really imagined myself finding the love of my life either. Trying to think of what I really love doing and brings me the most joy in life, beyond my daughter, I honestly have NO clue! I like to do a lot of things, but you would never know it by the stack of unfinished projects and plans on my desk. I am surrounded by the consequences of my directionally challenged life.
How do I finally begin to conquer these mountains and find my soul mate? Every experience I have had with love has ended with me on the losing end, financially, emotionally - all around brokenness. I have been single so long that being in a relationship is a completely foreign concept to me. Being single is easier and all I have known, but as my own life has shown me, you get what you expect out of life. I want to start expecting more, getting more but I ask you, honestly how?
The one constant in my life has been that I have always felt different, out-of-place and never truly comfortable in my own skin. For as long as I can remember, something has always seemed to be missing, a piece of the puzzle that just won't fit. What I am chasing I do not know, but the harder I search, the more elusive this "thing" becomes to find. At 31-years-old, finding me has become a journey with no destination.
My childhood was far from perfect, but I had/have parents who love/loved me and according to all educational standards a slightly above average intelligence. I studied, learned and did everything I was "suppose" to do, but it just didn't add up. Somewhere along the way, this mathematical equation that was supposed to equal me having a happy and productive adult life went wrong. My miscalculations along the way have not come without a price. The overwhelming realization is that I never had a destination in mind; I couldn't keep my eye on the prize because I never knew what it was or if I even wanted it.
Is it possible to fear success as much as failure? I never imagined that I would be a single mother still searching for love at 31-years-old, but when I really think about it; I never really imagined myself finding the love of my life either. Trying to think of what I really love doing and brings me the most joy in life, beyond my daughter, I honestly have NO clue! I like to do a lot of things, but you would never know it by the stack of unfinished projects and plans on my desk. I am surrounded by the consequences of my directionally challenged life.
How do I finally begin to conquer these mountains and find my soul mate? Every experience I have had with love has ended with me on the losing end, financially, emotionally - all around brokenness. I have been single so long that being in a relationship is a completely foreign concept to me. Being single is easier and all I have known, but as my own life has shown me, you get what you expect out of life. I want to start expecting more, getting more but I ask you, honestly how?
Saturday, January 9, 2010
"I believe books are meant to change, not pretty up the world" -Meridith Maran-
My heart beats faster and I get butterflies in my stomach every time I find someone with the courage to talk about the difference between how things are supposed to be in these United States and how they actually are, always believing that knowledge is power. I am proud of my liberal politics; I'll trade the good life for a life that stands a chance of actually doing some good any day!
The irony of my life is that as accepting and forgiving of others as I am, to myself I am rigid, critical and brutally overbearing. All the writing acclamations, praise and awards do little to silence the "editor" in my head. Year after year, I have allowed self-doubt and fear to spread like a cancerous disease, slowly eating away at my creativity and imagination.
Well after much praying, soul searching and self examination, the only answer I can come up with is...
NO MORE!!!
Succeed or fail, I am going to write! Spelling, punctuation and grammatical errors be what they may; I refuse to be held hostage by Merriam Webster and the AP Style Guide any longer! Somewhere along the way, all the tools I was given to improve and compliment my writing boxed me in to a wrong or right, good or bad mentality. My chronic need to please at any cost has brought me to a crossroad in my life; the terrifying fear of what others might think pales in comparison to living a life of "could of, should of, would have" in front of my beautiful and amazing daughter.
This blog is my journey plain and simple. My writing, admirable or ridiculous as it may seem, is a window into my soul. It will be random, timid at first and always honest; the only thing I can guarantee is that I will keep writing!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
